In my ongoing project to make hip-hop music accessible to aging white folks, I give you the first verse of “Scenario,” originally by A Tribe Called Quest, as performed by Trent Lott:
Here we are, sir. Here we are sir. What is your current situation?
Here we are, sir. Here we are sir. What is your current situation?
While young Vincent may be aware of many things, he sadly ignorant, as he is incapable of rhyming.
Pay attention: I am about to do so in his stead, and, might I add, for free.
My time is valuable, however, as I need to earn money so that I might be able to feed my family.
My esteemed colleagues intimate that we are incapable of rhyming ourselves, but let them be reminded that they have underestimated us in the past, to their grief.
If you are tired, I can offer you a generic cold medicine, but you may miss information that you may find interesting:
I am extremely good-looking and have superb hair.
So that you might be made aware of my heritage, I will ejaculate upon you.
I am tired of and angry with your inability to accept my legitimacy on this stage!
Perhaps you should retreat to Mexico and partake of their spicy foods.
I will continue to perform here as needed.
So, please, have a seat, and enjoy our fine hospitality.
Worry not about what has been said today, and remain self-confident in all things.
Technically, the name of the band is A Tribe Called Quest. Just a point of reference for you. I know your strict attention to detail.
Rob
Right you are. Duly corrected.
Yes yes y’all!
You might consider posting these gems to the “reformat songs” livejournal community. You would be showered with gifts of bacon and gold.