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This article irritated me, just for the headline: Petty, Not Earnhardt, Is the Real King of Daytona Petty Won Seven Daytona 500s, Six More Than Earnhardt Whoa. Somebody sounds bitter. I’m an Earnhardt fan, and I don’t remember ever saying he was the King of anything. (Anything except my heart.) Having a headline like […] For years now, friends of mine have been telling me “Dude, Hearn, you totally have to see ‘The Big Lebowski,’ dude, it’s totally YOU.” So on Sunday, after church but BEFORE my audition, Hearnwife and I rented it via the technological marvel that is “Comcast OnDemand” and gave it a watch. Here is what […] Ah, Valentines day. The day in which I have to come with a card and a reasonably quality present for HW, else I’ll come home and she’ll present me with a thick card that folds out to reveal a 12th century triptych icon on thin cardboard, complete with gold leaf inlay halos. Once I finish […] So much for daily postings huh? Argh. The mind, the body, and the spirit were weak, not to mention every time I tried to type something up, something came up. Wednesday, I started a column and had to leave the office to go manhandle servers around all afternoon, followed by an evening of having burnt […] What the hell, weatherman? It’s freakin’ February, and the temperature keeps getting up into the 50s? Yesterday afternoon at the grocery store I had to keep hobbling down to the frozen foods aisle and stick my torso and head in a freezer to ensure that I didn’t succumb. (If you find my hat frozen to […] Let the random tidbits of rambled information begin! So, Wicked = Awesome. I daresay, Wicked > *. (Wicked is “greater than” “all,” if you aren’t a loser geek like me.) It would have been nice to see it with the original Broadway cast, but beggars can’t be choosers. I thought it was amazing anyway. […] A late post of PURE UNADULTERATED FICTION, YO! Enjoy! The first time we met, I was drunk. (This was hardly unexpected; it was early in my junior year, it was a Friday night, and I lived with 2 roommates in an apartment directly over a bar.) The bar was called the “Wild and Wicked” […] A plethora of interesting information today, good, bad, and ugly: I am NOT a huge fan of this at all. That’s right: some poor woman was murdered, in her own house, about 4 blocks from my home. BAD. TIMES. ALL AROUND. As of the moment, the police have zero suspects. I have a desperate urge […] I’m getting a little bitter at the fact that googlism.com STILL knows nothing about me, despite the fact that I have the most popular website on the internet, based on statistics that were given to me by my accountant, who I hired away from Enron back in 2002. However, it seems to know lots of […] Jared has alerted me to the existence of Diet Cherry Vanilla Doctor Pepper. As he put it, “Talk about [very bad word] complicated.” I’d have to agree. I’ve never been a huge Doctor Pepper fan to begin with; I find it tastes like some horrible mutated love-child of sarsaparilla (pronounced “root beer”) and denatured brake […] |