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For a little while there, I was fairly certain that God just didn’t care for my presence in this world and was attempting to cause my death. Strike me down, Sith-style, if you smell what The Hearn is braising. In an effort to limit my girth, which has once again neared Rosie O’Donnell proportions, I […] I have decided, unsurprisingly, that I really really really REALLY like hanging out with my son, babbling and tickling and drooling and all that. In a similar vein, I have also discovered that I really really REALLY don’t like showing up to an office every day, during which time I have to go for like […] I feel James Lileks’s pain, I really do. He probably wouldn’t believe me; his response would be something like “That’s ridiculous. You wear XL. Everything is XL or bigger,” which is true. But there’s XL, and then there’s XL. For example: I have long arms and a fairly sizeable neck, like a football player […] I’ve decided I should get a job with Microsoft, or some other large company, to come up with better error messages. The old “fatal error: 0x03F33B458C out of memory” just isn’t cutting for me, because it doesn’t have much meaning to the average computer user. “Fatal error? Am I going to die?” they ask, […] Whew. Things seem to have calmed down a wee bit in my office, and I think I finally caught most of the way back up on my mail and various tasks. By which I mean, I’m only like 2 years behind at this point. As the old saying goes, “God put me here on earth […] Worry not, I’m here. Team Hearn took a lengthy vacation to Texas to meet the relatives, all of which are awesome. I will have full details at a later date when I not swamped LIKE WHOA, so to tide you over in the meantime I highly recommend that you slide on over to CharlesHearn.com for […] They’ve moved me and the rest of my team to new digs, which so far has been totally sweet. The new office (which is actually an old office, but they got rid of a bunch of people (there’s a big mound out back that I assume contains the bodies) and so we were moved so […] Worth noting: The News Journal was kind enough to finally print a review of My Fair Lady. Good job, what with us having just 2 shows left, one of which is sold out! Nothing like timeliness. On the other hand, they did say I have operatic flair. Unfortunately, they made no mention of my sweet […] All right all you Jack Samsonites put on your face eyes and listen with your hair ears because I have a QUESTION and I know at least one of my readers has an IQ above 40 and MIGHT be able to answer it so HERE. IT. GOES. Well, actually, there’s some background first. […] Okay, here’s the word: I’m not dead, although I did fight off a nasty case of food poisoning this weekend that laid me heck of low. I’m still kinda feverish, I think, with the sweating and chills and JUICINESS IN MY PUPPISS. (Glavin.) The show is going outstandingly (note: not a real word), aside from […] |