Screamin’

Richard over at Honest Hypocrite is pissed, and with pretty good reason:

About the time when we seem to be getting Linus calmed, a manager (the unfriendly one) comes over and tells us in the most officious manner possible that some of the other patrons have been threatening to leave because of our crying baby, and some parents take their children outside to calm them, and isn’t teething tough.

Wow. I can honestly say, I’ve taken Charles and/or Josephine to any number of restaurants, and I’ve never had anything like that happen. Richard has asked for responses and advice, but before I do that, I have qualifications and caveats:

  1. When I think my own kids are disturbing someone else’s meal, it drives me insane. Ruins dinner for me, even if the other patrons don’t say anything.

  2. Conversely, I’ve never been bothered by someone’s baby, other than my own, crying at dinner. I’m routinely pissed about other people’s kids’ behavior, but that happens all the time, not just at restaurants. Babies cry; that’s how they roll. Maybe Linus is particularly loud, but I doubt it.

  3. I have two kids, and I know their moods and behavior pretty well; if I think, based on factors like previous behavior, time of day, nap status, food status, etc., that the one or other of the kids is going to be a pill, we won’t go. This isn’t to say I haven’t guessed wrong, and I’m certainly not making any assumptions about Richard and his wife’s ability to gauge Linus’s behavior, I’m just saying that by and large I’ll do just about anything to avoid the above situation, so perhaps that’s why it hasn’t happened to me.

  4. I’m pretty selective about where I’ll take my kids. Red Robin? Sure. Walter’s Steakhouse? No. Friendly’s? Of course. The Corner Bistro? Maybe for brunch, but never for dinner. I see kids taken to these places and it feels awkward to me, even if they are well-behaved. Now, I know nothing about Bensi’s. I’ve never heard of it. It might be the kind of place where I’d look at it and think “Of course, kids, no problem.” Since Richard mentioned there were other families with kids there, I’m inclined to think it’s a bit more of a family restaurant, and perhaps the complaining diners were just douche-knuckles.


Okay, enough caveats and explanation. Here’s my take: given that Linus was merely crying, and not running rampant through the restaurant, and there were enough other children there to qualify Bensi’s as supposedly-kid-friendly, I’d say the customers who complained were out-of-line. I’d also say the manager who complained was waaaaaay out-of-line. If something like this had happened to Sarah and me and the kids, here’s what the responses would have been:


Me: “Really? Are you kidding me?”


Sarah: “F%&# you, @?#hole.” ::rips off manager’s face and makes it into a drippy chapeau::


And then we’d pack up and leave without paying. We’d also probably jury rig some silverware so we could hang a stinky diaper above the table candle.

  1. August 3rd, 2009 at 16:05 | #1

    Bensi is above a red Robin or Friendly’s but below Walter’s. It is a franchise Italian restaurant spreading from North Jersey. In Wilmington/Delco area I think that an equivalent level restaurant would by a franchise like P.F. Chang’s on Rt 1 (but Italian and not Asian, obviously). I agree with you Linus won’t be going with us to Walter’s or Deep Blue or Corner Bistro. We like the Corner Bistro a lot but have only taken Linus for lunch to Lucky’s Diner, which is run by the same people. He usually sleeps through it, even after immunizations at the doctor’s which is nearby and the reason we go there.

    Your point 1 is spot on, Lynn and I were pulling out all of the tricks to quiet an unusually vocal baby because we can’t eat or enjoy our meal if he needs attention, and we are aware that others want to enjoy their meals as well. Lynn reminded me that he probably cried four times in a twenty minute period, which we as parents think is four sessions, but which sensitive eared people without or past young children stage might just think was on long crying jag. Your point 3 was modified by the presence of grandparents wanting to take us out to a restaurant they had previously qualified as kid friendly. We fed Linus before we went to avoid just that situation of fussiness.

    Thanks for the advice, but as enjoyable as it would have been I doubt we will be ripping faces off anytime soon, though I think we had a stinky diaper… We were so shocked at the manager’s comments that our response was being speechless.

  2. Matt G
    September 15th, 2009 at 13:50 | #2

    “Linus had just been breastfed and so we thought we would be good to go.” So you though the kid would be quiet but he wasn’t. Obviously the parents knew in advance a loud child might be a problem.

    Eh. Sorry but I gotta side with the patrons and manager here. Not everyone loves your child…screaming or otherwise. Additionally they have the right to refuse service to anyone. That’s a tough pill to swallow when you are that “anyone”.

    Personally, I’d like to ban kids under 15 from being seated at any restaurant after 7pm. After that they are old enough to get tazered or kicked in the stomach by a Mexican dishwasher.

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