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I’ve been digging wells for 4 years now, and nobody does it better or faster. I can punch through your foundation and dig down to the water table in one day, and you’ll have a non-federal water source for however long you can keep the government from finding out. I also set up the filter and pumping apparatus, and maintain it for a nominal fee.

“Look at it as an investment, Mr. Hawkins. Today’s published rate for water is $17 a gallon, and that’s assuming you get in line early enough to get a few jugs before they run out. With a family of 5, you go through almost 3 gallons a day, right?”

“Yeah, if we can get it.”

I smiled. “That’s $51 a day. Over $18,000 a year. I charge $14,000 for setup, and $2000 a year for filtering service. My wells are guaranteed to provide up to 15 gallons of drinkable water per day.”

“And if the government finds out?”

“Then you lose your well and pay a fine.” And, like every customer who’d been caught so far, try to give me up to the feds in exchange for leniency. Which is why no customer ever learned my real name, saw my real face, or heard my real voice.

Lionel Hawkins seemed about average, as far as customers went. He didn’t like disobeying the government, but his wife was pregnant again. The other three kids had been born dangerously underweight, each worse than the last. Mrs. Hawkins just couldn’t get enough water. I hoped they’d be able to keep the well until she had the baby; most customers averaged around 6 months before the secret got out. They try to sneak some clean water to a sick friend and get picked up, or one of the kids lets it slip at school, and that’s that. The Commission descends, the well is destroyed (often along with the house), and somebody has to come up with a 6-figure sum. If Mr. and Mrs. Whoever can’t pay the fine, they go to jail for 5 years, and the kids go into foster care.

“I’m not sure I can come up with $14,000 right now. What kind of financing can you get me?”

“Sir, I’m not a car dealer. This is not a legal enterprise. You’ll have to arrange that stuff yourself. Also, I ask that you pay the yearly filter fee up front, so I need $16,000 from you before I can start work. In cash.”

“You expect me to have sixteen grand in cash laying around here somewhere?” I knew he did. With the state of the banking system, the best way to secure money was to buy gold with it and lock it up at home. I also knew, from the background check, that Lionel Hawkins had more money than most.

“Sir, there’s no hurry. Gather the funds and email me when you’re ready, and I’ll schedule a time to come back.” He’d had to wait four months for me to fit him into my schedule the first time. I’m not really all that busy, but I find it does help people make decisions more quickly when they think I won’t come back for half a year. I turned and headed for the door.

“Wait. If I can find the money, you can start today?”

“And you’ll have carbon-filtered water in time for dinner.”

“Okay. If you want, you can go get started while I look for the money.”

I’d heard that one before. “No rush. I’ll wait while you look.”

By 6pm I was done. The Hawkins’ foundation had been thicker than usual, and it took me until 2 or so to get through that, but once I reached dirt I was home free. The pump and filter took me about an hour, and then Mrs. Hawkins took a drink of water straight from the spigot and hugged me.

On the drive home, I thought about her baby, and made the call. It would have been nice to wait a few months and give them more time, but I needed the money right away. My bookie doesn’t empathize well.

“It’s me.”

“Whatcha got?”

“Hawkins. 779 Spirit Drive, in Delton.”

“Thanks. Anything we should know?”

“The woman is pregnant, about 4 months along. Can you hold off and give her enough time to have the kid?”

A sigh. “You know the pressure on the Commission to crack down. I’ll put a note in the file, but no promises.”

“Thanks.” I hung up. It was out of my hands.