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iMoan

I don’t know what the hell is wrong with people. Okay, I get it, there’s no iPhone 5 this October. I guess if you’re a complete idiot who knows nothing more about technology than “5 is a bigger number than 4,” this is a serious disappointment. But let’s go over a few important facts:





iPhone 4iPhone 4S
ProcessorApple A4Dual-core Apple A5
Still camera5MP8MP
Video720p HD1080p HD
Incredible AI-Voice Recognition applicationnoneSiri

I’ve left out memory comparisons (because we don’t know what the memory in the 4S is, yet) and the new dual-antenna wireless connection (because I’m not sure how big a grain of salt to take with the prediction of doubling cellular data speeds). Still: in what ridiculous crack-den world are folks living in that this is anything less than a major upgrade? They could call it “iPhone Zero” and it would be completely awesome. Sure, if I already had an iPhone 4, I wouldn’t feel the need to upgrade. But if you have to upgrade your smartphone every single year, I’m going to predict that you’re a major douchekabibble anyway. Like, you know, this guy:
There’s nothing really notable, physically, about the iPhone 4S in comparison to the iPhone 4. Do you have an iPhone 4? Pick it up. Look at it. Turn it over. There, you’ve just done an iPhone 4S hands-on. Congratulations!

Seriously? Your initial reaction to the release of a new phone with twice the CPU is “Sigh, it’s the same shape!” I wonder if this idiot refuses to buy DVDs or BlueRays because they’re the same form-factor as a CD.


This phone is obviously an upgrade over the iPhone 4, and if you’re like me and still floundering along on an old 3G, it’s like going from an IBM XT to an Alienware scream machine. I’m not sure when Apple will actually open the store to get this phone, but I plan to stay up until midnight in case they’ll take my order at 12:01 on October 7th. A few other notes on the subject:


The “back” (or primary) camera went from 5 to 8 megapixels, but that may be the least of its improvements. They’ve opened the aperture to f/2.4 for better low-light shooting (I prefer using a fast aperture over using a flash), and the new lens has 5 elements to sharpen the photos. Plus, image stabilization in the video mode, which is now 1080p (better HD resolution than my Flip).


Siri looks totally rad, although I need to use it to really see if it’s useful. I’ve had other phones with voice recognition, and it was little more than a gimmick. I also don’t fully trust AI after being boned so many times over by that damned paperclip.


I’m define bullying indifferent to this iCloud thing as well; we’ll see how well it works. Having only 5GB of free storage makes it next to useless, really, although I guess being able to use it to back up your phone before doing a PC-less upgrade is pretty win.


Mostly, frankly, I’m just excited to have a phone that can background apps, do Facetime, and not have things constantly crash because 128MB of DRAM doesn’t cut it with iOS4 apps.

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