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I hate bacteria. You hear me? Bacteria SUCK. Or perhaps viruses. Or both. I don’t really know. I hab a code, and I hate it.

Woke up Monday morning with the tell-tale agonizing throatache, and now I’m all drugged up and stuffy headed and bad times, damnit, which explains why my grasp of the […]

Wait, what? What the heck is this? Rain? Cold? Wind? Oh, nay nay, ye Gods of The Weathere, back thy jaunpiece OFF.

Although I do need the rain, because watering my new flowerbeds and my dead grass has become Tedious. (The capital T is how you know I am not playin’.)

Luckily, last […]

So, <pause to spit chaw-juice into an old Genesee can> went fishin’ yesterday. Threw out the old line, ya know. Catch anythin’? Why, we’ll get to that part of the story directly.

I went with my buddy Mike, who is a fishin’ aficionado (the tintinabulation! I’m like Poe all up in this piece), to […]

I haven’t run with this in a while, so I figured it was time to drag out Ye Olde Advice Columne Gimmicke, as usual despite the fact that nobody actually writes me asking for help. This time, instead of making up my own questions, I’m going to search online advice boards to swipe questions from […]

In which there ain’t no wedding like a Pakistani wedding ’cause Pakistani weddings got CURRY:

I’m seriously serious, if you want to party like it’s 2099, you need to go to a wedding like that which I attended on Saturday night, with HW in tow. (Yes, before you asked, of course we looked hot.) […]

Okay, I promise, I’m not going to turn this into a sports blog, or something. But this year, for no discernible reason, I’m really stoked about baseball (despite the Phillies’ 1-5 start to the season), so I think about it a fair amount, which means that time normally spent thinking on column topics like “Natasha […]

To be blunt: James Blunt sucks.

(Ha HA! See what I did there? With the making fun of his name? I am freakin’ SLICK, people, and you need to RECOGNIZE.)

His new song “You’re Beautiful” has been floating around in the top 20 for several weeks now, and I have to admit, at […]

Aaaaaaaand we’re back. Sorry for falling off the face of the earth for the last three weeks, but the time that I usually spend on this every other day was sadly required for sleeping. In order: High school show (Footloose): went extremely well. In fact, I dare say it was the best of the ones […]