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Holiday: Celebrate.

I hope everybody had an enjoyable long weekend. Mine could not possibly have been less restful, and for once my children aren’t entirely to blame. Only, you know, mostly.

The elder 66% of my children have birthdays this month, so Sunday we had a large birthday party for them. I’ll get to more on that […]

Dream analysis, yet again

Had us a nice little vacation last week. Went down to Ocean View with the folks, ate like pigs, swam in the indoor pool in the clubhouse, chased the kids around the yard, drank entirely too much. After 3 days of this my body simply rebelled. I felt like six asses all last week. (Punctuation […]

Burn, baby, burn

I now know far more than I really wanted to about my oil boiler. (Who am I kidding? That thing is fricking PIMP. It’s apparently the best boiler that money can buy, and it’s built like a brit shickhouse.)

After running it out of oil the other day and suffering through a night where the […]

Screen door on a submarine

How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? Turn off the carousel.

Since we’re moving in a few days, and things have been crazy hectic around the house, we’ve been remiss in properly entertaining our children. We need every spare moment to pack, clean, and/or paint something, so more often than not we plop […]


I tried to play like I’d post on vacation, but gave up in favor of heavy drinking. Now that I’m back, you can enjoy some pictures taken on my vacation.



Cats are messed up animals. Pete, for example, has developed a somewhat fatherly relationship with Josephine. Occasionally, when she’s being fed or resting in her bouncy seat, Pete will come by and gently lick her head, or rub against her.

She, of course, loves him. When he saunters by she can’t keep her eyes off […]


Even as we speak, a supremely competent fellow named Joe is installing Verizon FiOS in our new house. (Well, new to us. The house was built before my great-great-grandparents were born.) My excitement is ExxxxTRREEEEEEM. I’ve wanted to try FiOS for a while, since a package including basic TV, internet, and phone is the same […]

Eyeball pressure

I’ve had this funny spot in my vision for a couple days, and also I haven’t seen an optometrist in roughly ever, so I scheduled an appointment to have my peepers examined yesterday. I’m the only person of my age that I know who doesn’t wear any kind of corrective lenses, but recently things have […]

The things

Let’s just cover everything in rapid-fire list form, ’cause that’s how I be rollin’ fo sho. (I don’t understand many of the things I just typed.)

I’m down to 249 as of this morning, despite drinking more than I should have over the weekend; I attribute the continued weight loss to constantly working on my […]


I haven’t updated everyone on the status of my gut, so here’s the lowdown: still fat. Lost 19 pounds in a little over 5 weeks, though, so I guess I’m doing something right (not eating; occasionally running until I throw up).

I’d like to lose about 38 more. That’s gonna be tough; even in 2004, […]